You Can Plan A Pretty Picnic But...

About 24 hours ago, I stumbled into the lobby of the Fairmont Hotel in Santa Monica; mentally and physically exhausted, shivering, soaked to the bone, and completely and utterly humbled. The hotel had become the unofficial sanctuary for the road weary amateur runners of the 2011 LA Marathon, due to the worst weather in marathon history. Not Los Angeles history, marathon history. Torrential rains, winds that ranged between 20 mph and 60 mph, and shin-deep currents that turned the streets of LA into rivers. All around me, runners huddled in corners, wrapped in their mylar race blankets, trying to figure out how they were going to get home. A man on a loud speaker was making an announcement to all marathon participants, asking them to leave, as hotel staff in neatly pressed blue and white uniforms, mopped up puddles left by soggy runners. This is not how I had pictured the end of my first marathon.

Early Sunday morning, I awoke to my 3:30 am alarm, feeling better than I ever have at 3:30 am. I had prepared for this early rise by getting extra sleep the previous couple of nights, so I was well rested. I did some light stretching, put on the clothes I had laid out the night before, and headed out the door. Our timing was perfect and we hopped on a shuttle bus just minutes before departing to the starting line at Dodgers Stadium. All of the sudden, I was frazzled. I hadn't pinned on my race bib yet. I had brought a banana but suddenly was too nervous to eat. The official drawstring gear bag didn't close by itself unless I tied it in a knot. It was all too much. As the bus entered the 10 Freeway going East, my boyfriend, Dave, who had signed up to run with me, looked at me and smiled, "The distance this bus is driving is the same distance we'll be running today." The reality of that statement sank in like a sumo wrestler on a foam mattress, leaving a lasting impression.

The scene at Dodgers Stadium was chaotic, to say the least. Near the front doors, I did my best to stay warm in the chill of the early March morning. I wore layers I could easily part with as I warmed up during my run, while other more experienced runners strutted around in nothing but shorts and tank tops. A group of kids wore bright yellow shirts that read "Students Run LA" and sprayed each other with something that smelled like grandma's house. Middle-aged women wearing pink and purple prepared for the rainy forecast by slipping on their homemade garbage bag rain slickers. A man who looked like he'd just stepped off the set of the "Rocky Horror Picture Show: Riff Raff's Revenge", wore short-shorts, a wife beater, and a plaid dinner jacket with coattails. He carried a silver serving tray, balancing a single wine bottle. On his back was a sign: "Coatman." This was obviously NOT his first marathon.

After finally eating some banana, and asking advice from a couple of the speed walkers (who I'd probably be joining later in the race), Dave and I headed out towards the 11:00 minute mile corral. Choirs sang America the Beautiful and the Star Spangled Banner and I started to get jacked up. The wheelchair racers led the way, followed by the elite women, then the elite men. I couldn't see them but I knew they were there, running the same course as me. One by one, each corral crossed the starting line until the crowd in front of me began moving forward. The MC played the LA sports theme song "I Love LA" and the crowd got hyped. (As a sidenote, making fun of Randy Newman is one of my favorite activities, so I was doubly hyped). It was finally happening! No matter how my knee felt, no matter how cold it was, no matter how much the heavens rained down on me, nothing could stop me from crossing that finish line.

Now, I know what you're thinking and don't panic. Like waking up and trying to recall your dreams, it would be impossible to give you a mile-by-mile replay, not to mention time-consuming, long-winded, and boring for my sweet, loyal seven readers.

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TOP TEN THINGS THAT MADE IT THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE:
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1. Starting out strong with a nice, steady jog

2. Ripping off my bulky, old sweatshirt and tossing it onto a downtown street corner

3. Watching thousands of bobbing heads making their way up the first hill on the empty city streets (the most beautiful thing I've ever seen)

4. Complete strangers, in almost every neighborhood on the route, yelling my name and encouraging me to keep going (If I don't run next year, that will definitely be me!)

5. The light drizzle that hit just as my body started to heat up

6. Advice from barefoot runners about making the switch ("Watch out for hypodermic needles")

7. The drag cheerleaders and male strippers of West Hollywood

8. Not giving up despite ever-growing pain, boredom, and potential hypothermia

9. Volunteers who stood out in the rain to hand out water, Gatorade, and snacks with warm smiles and cheers

10. Dave, who waited for me for over 2 hours in the Starlight Ballroom, with hot tea and blankets

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TOP TEN THINGS THAT MADE IT THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE:
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1. The pain in my right knee that started near Mile 5

2. The reality that I could no longer run at all and still had more than 16 miles ahead of me

3. Watching runners fight over an open port-a-potty

4. Getting passed by people older and fatter than me

5. Silent stretches of road that seemed to last forever

6. Wind and rain that began before I even reached the halfway point, never let up once, and turned into a storm which gave thousands of runners hypothermia and sent 25 of them to the hospital

7. Hands so cold and wet they turned red and shook when I tried to drink water

8. Watching runners collapse and be carried off, unable to finish after they had come so far

9. The last few miles, spent wading through water, while police advised runners to move up onto the sidewalk to reopen the roads of Brentwood

10. Knowing I wouldn't be able get a picture of myself crossing the finish line because I chose not take off the layers of plastic that shielded me from the storm but also covered up my race number

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MY FAVORITE SIGNS ALONG THE ROUTE:
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"You're at Mile 5. The Kenyans are at Mile 15."

"If You Are Losing Faith In Human Nature, Watch A Marathon."

"You're in Brentwood."

"Your vacation is 2.2 miles away."

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NUGGETS OF NEW FOUND WISDOM:
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1. Don't plan on running a marathon with an injury. I know that seems like an obvious, logical piece of advice but I didn't follow it so why should you? There is always another race to conquer and a simple injury can lead to a big one.

2. Train for your long runs using the fuel you'll be using on race day. The combination of nerves and fuel I had never tried before made me take more bathroom stops than a runner should, making my finish time even worse.

3. SMILE! It helps! People see your smiling face and that makes them smile, which can come in handy at around Mile 18 or so.

4. Don't carry a pack full of water. It was a great security blanket for my first time, but it pressed into my stomach, making my cramps worse. There were no long lines for water or snacks at any of the aid stations.

5. Fat can be fit. I saw ladies with big, round kabooses fly past me as I hobbled along. Whatever you did the six months before race day, shows through on race day. It's all about your training.

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MY FINAL THOUGHTS:
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I finished the 2011 LA Marathon in 7 hours, 40 minutes and 49 seconds, and placed 18,873rd out of 19,781 overall runners. But I did it! I participated in my first marathon, I didn't die, and I finished under the worst possible conditions! Any marathon I run will be better than this. I can only get smarter, stronger, and faster. If you're thinking to yourself, "I wonder if I could do a marathon", the answer is YES! Yes you can! If you think you can, then you can. You just keep going, you do whatever it takes to keep moving forward, until you cross that finish line. If I can do it, anyone can do it!

p.s. Don't forget to breathe. I can't stress enough how important is to breathe. It helps you not pass out. Trust me.